November 03, 2005
look what the french did to federman==========>
but notice what federman tells the french with his finger
I think we'll have to put this one up on the blog
look what the french did to federman
but notice what federman is saying with his finger to the french
voila que ca me reprend. Ce que je veux dire est peut-être ceci, que peu à peu les bruits du monde, si divers en eux-même et que je savais si bien distinguer les uns des autres, à force peut-être d’être toujours les mêmes se sont fondus en un seul, jusqu’à ne plus être qu’un seul grand bourdonnement.
There I go again. What I mean is possibly this, that the noises of the world, as various in themselves and which I used to be so clever in distinguishing from one another, had been dinning at me for so long, always the same old noise, as gradually to have merge into a single noise, so that all I heard was vast continuous buzzing.
George [Chambers] writes:
Federman you know this picture so large huge disturbing the cover picture among the angels I must gaze at flood me with feeling....it makes me not want to weep I'm sitting here near weeping I must look away I can't look I try to fumble the finger gesture it's the bare the body the cap of hair the opacity of the eyes the collar bone the shoulder bone the eyebrows the hair caps the face of scars the disembodied hand stuffing the finger into the skull it summons you forth it's unbearable
[Ray] Federman replies:
finally a photographer who knows how to capture the interior of the subject the guy told me when he walked into my hotel room I am not going to photograph you to make you look better
I want to photograph how you really are inside and damn did he do it he closed all the curtains in the room took his vest off put me against a curtain and started shooting and each time he had shot a photo he would breathe out in a very strange manner that resembles the moaning lovers do when they reach the clouds and then after a good half hour of digging inside me with his camera he suddenly said take off your shirt oh shit I thought the fucking guy is a pederast and wants to not at all he told me about his wife his kids his family well that was my way of getting it out of him when he asked me to take off my shirt I had to defend myself so I said are you married I said that in french of course since this was in my Paris hotel room that this scene was taking place I am translating for the commodity of the narrative and when he said he was and talked about the kids and even mentioned the in-laws I knew I was safe so I let it out all the perversion ugliness twisteness ebullitions energy viciousness kindness generosity and more that I have in me and that's all there in the photo as the finger is trying to point out